The Strange Case...

Tina Fey was on the verge of lashing out at her audience. She hadn't had a very good start to the day, and though it had improved, right now she was livid.

She had attended the London premiere of 'Date Night' the previous night and was hung-over from all the cocktails at the after-party. She woke up, with a splitting headache, to the realisation that she had a live show in one of the more prestigious stand-up theatres in town.

She was feeling quite pleased with herself by that afternoon having finalised the script and was quite proud of some of the jokes. Quite strange how she agreed to do this show. She had received a mysterious phone call from a Gabriel John Utterson, asking her to perform in London, and though she was skeptical, having never heard of Mr. Utterson, she agreed since the dates fit quite well with her London trip for promoting the movie anyway.

Unbeknownst to her, the mysterious Mr. Utterson was actually Dr. Utterson, trying to investigate a mystery that had had him perplexed for a while.

And now, halfway into her show, Tina Fey was absolutely livid, on the verge of lashing out. Two people at the back of the theatre were continuously heckling her and passing sarcastic remarks, throwing her off rhythm and making her miss punchlines. She controlled her anger and somehow managed to push through the show.

Backstage, she storms up to Mr. (Dr.) Utterson and yells at him, as she sees him actually talking to those two people quite politely.

"Who the hell do these people think they are!!!? They ruined my show, I will take them to court, and you too Gabriel, if I have to!!!"

"Calm down, calm down", Utterson said, "they didn't do it on purpose. It is just who they are".

"Tina Fey" he says gesturing towards them, "meet Dr. Heckle and Mr. Snide"

:-/

Pain in the ass...

Ben, Harry, Jerry, Sean, Tom, Jim, Percy, Ron and Chris planned a day out. They went and watched 'Final Destination 3' and then went to the amusement park to ride the roller coaster.

They sat on the ride and strapped themselves in. Then suddenly Ron, the party pooper in the otherwise enthusiastic group, had a premonition and a muscle in his bum started spasming uncontrollably.
He yelled at all his friends to get off the ride and all of them got off, if a little reluctantly.

And what do you know, like in the movie they had just watched, the ride did crash, killing everyone on it!!!

Then Ben aptly observed, "Ass twitch in time, saved nine"

Groovy Movie...

The teller at the Bellagio, Las Vegas was pissed off, and with good reason!

She had been using Groove, the Microsoft Office product which synchronises data across multiple computers, and it worked like a dream, coordinating across multiple cash collection points across the huge casino.
Now, out of the blue, MS had revoked their license on a whim, and she was determined to not let the matter go lightly.
She sued the living daylights out of MS and as you know, 'the house never loses' so she did finally win the case.

This was made into movie and it was called "House Teller got her Groove back"